Thursday, October 17th, 2002
Wow! It has been a full week since I updated last! I am getting as bad as my columnist… No wait, your right. I would have to not update for about 8 months to be on the same level as them! Honestly, I don’t think they will ever update. What? Fire them you say? I can’t! They are either related to me or my very close friends, and I want to get Christmas gifts this year! So we will just have to pray… and go bug those guys to death on the forums and by their email.
Friday, October 11th, 2002
It seems as if my idea of Joelika.com featuring me in a bikini was a bad one. In fact, it was even called a very bad idea by most. See, if I was only a girl everyone would be all happy instead of hunched over their toilettes in disgust. So for now, I guess all of you will just have to wait for the new Joelika.com design and forgo the Joelika.com Miami puke fest.
Monday, October 7th, 2002
Well, it is finally getting colder outside. This is nature’s way of telling the plants, animals, and naked mole rats that it’s time to come on inside to their little burros and catch an all new fall season line up of their most favorite TV shows! And that’s not all my friends! Nature is also telling you that a choice few websites are also preparing to unleash upon their internet viewers a brand new look to make you spend all your money… or in my case, for me to spend my own money!
Tuesday, October 1st, 2002
You are looking at the next official Jacob Albright Scholar my friends! Oh yes, for those of you who were not aware of my prestigious position in the Jacob Albright Group of Nerd Scholars, well, why aren’t you stocking me? This achievement is the pinnacle of my nerdom and general loser like image which I have been perfecting for years. Sure, it means that I am smarter than 90% of those attending Albright (not to brag or anything… stupid), but I do have one distinctive advantage… I am not drunk 90% of the time! Straightedge to eternity! I’ll never pledge to a fraternity (and definitely not a sorority after watching sorority life on MTV… talk about a show that was not ‘bachelorettes in Alaska’)!
Friday, September 27th, 2002
Well, today I decided to do something I said I would never do. Yes, I decided to visit those hallowed halls of my old high school! Why would I want to do such a horrid thing? Well, my one buddy told me to meet him there for a soccer game, so I did. In all actuality, I had fun. I saw such famous people as Archie Bunker, Tung Sue Do Boy, my little sister… Yeah, you thought you knew my life… but you know nothing! This is the dairy of Joelika! My name is Juan Pablo Montoya!