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Thursday, July 4th, 2002

Happy 4th of July everyone! That is, if it is happy for you. You may not experience this happiness if you live in that nice vacation spot of Afghanistan or if you suffered a terrorist attack against your vehicles like I did this morning.

Yes, at the crack of dawn, before any sanctified hour that I normally awake, I was called out of bed to go and find my mother since the Mighty Green Astro Van had broken down. I rushed as fast as I could in the Ultra Speedy Mach One Modified Granny Car to rescue her. As I arrived on the scene, she was no wear to be found. The local crazy old woman was of no help so I continued my search. 20 minutes later I thought my mom had tapped her shoes together three times and warped home, so I deiced to try there. As I arrived, I saw her… With my relief turning into anger for awaking me so early to do nothing, I then spotted my brother’s car with a flat tire…. Who had been terrorizing our cars? Who in their right mind would do such a horrible thing and murder them?? Who ever you are, I am on to you, and I will find out who you are, and bomb you… then give you lots of relief efforts… That is the American way after all….

The new Joelika.com Shirts and Hoodies in the Joelika.com Store! Yes! You can finally purchase those wonderful Joelika.com goodies! They are some nice shirts, just to let you know (Now on Fruit Of The Loom Apparel!). No lie, I think they are a lot better than the last batch I had done. Shirts are still 15 dollars and the hoodies are 30 dollars. Come off it! Don’t give me that poo on how you are poor. I know a bunch of you just graduated… that means lots of money! And the rest of you are working like crazy, so take a break and spend that money at the Joelika.com Store! You won’t regret it!

Hey you! Yeah you! Go and freakin post something! Look, talking to your friends face to face is boring! Create your own alter ego here and do whatever the heck you want! Yeah!

Buy your favorite movies in their full CD quality at the Joelika.com Store! Don’t only go through life with seeing the dial up version, but see the movies in their true form with CD Quality sound and full frame motion! You will never look at the Joelika movies in the same way! They have low prices so act now! New movies to be sold soon. For now, you can buy the dual season of Spruce Lake `99 and Spruce Lake 2000 for only 5 dollars! And the new Spruce Lake 2001 Teaser for 2! Do it today!

Don’t forget to check out today’s events on the Official Joelika.com Calendar. Want an event posted? Email it to me.

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